Perfect Keto "Review"

The first day of the last month of the year. Curious how the rest will pan out.

NOTE - This is not a paid post. I'm not cool enough to do things like that. I once was... maybe. And honestly, what follows isn't something they would pay me to say. 

One of the few items I bought on Black Friday was a jar of coffee flavored base from Perfect Keto. As you can see, it's something I've bought before, and use somewhat frequently. Enough that I thought buying another flavored base made sense. 

Long story short, these bases and MCT oil powder are what some people use to get into ketosis. Fat burning mode. Health... weight loss... blah blah blah. Diet and exercise? Oh yeah. But I get by with a little help from my friends. Or in this case, exogenous ketones and powdered medium chain triglycerides.

Like that? Bwahaha. 

I started with the peaches & cream base. I forget when I bought it. Early summer? I was listening to a podcast (can't remember which one) and they had mentioned using exogenous ketones to help with intermittent fasting. Figured why not, and ordered some ketones. The 40 percent off didn't hurt, because this stuff is pricey. 

PRO TIP - Don't go by the suggested serving size. That's a big scoop, and you're supposed to add it to 8-10 ounces of a liquid. I'm sorry, I tried it that way, I spit it out. It needed to be watered down. A lot. Now, I add about a third of a scoop to a liter of water, and that amount is tolerable. It may be the salts, or the stevia. Probably the stevia. Stevia is nasty. Also, the less you use per serving, the longer you can stretcher out that container. Which costs sixty bucks, btw.

From there I bought the MCT oil powder. I have the liquid MCT oil, which I use in my bulletproof/rocket fuel/fatty coffee. So why get it in the powdered form? Well, it works better than liquid MCT oil in other recipes. And, no oily film on the top of my coffee after the froth has disappeared. I've had no problems with this product, and will be buying it again. 

PRO TIP - Don't start with a full scoop!! Save your GI tract. Start small (1/2 scoop, maybe less), and slowly work your way up. This applies to both liquid and powdered form.

And now I have a coffee flavored base. Smells like coffee, which it should since it has ground coffee in it. Also has stevia, which boo. Half a teaspoon of the coffee base and half a teaspoon of the MCT oil powder to a large mug of coffee. Whipped up with a milk frother, and a splash of two of half & half. Because I like my ketones and triglycerides with coffee and cream.

Ba dum tsss...

Yeah?

Okay, I'm done. Have a good Friday.

Flax Seed Crackers

First day of September! How shall I celebrate? How about something LCHF/keto?

Most crackers are off limits on the lchf/keto diet. Shame, since cheese and crackers go hand in hand. I spotted Flackers at Fairway and decided to give it a try. I was expecting the worst, but it was really good! Looking at the ingredient list - flax seeds, apple cider vinegar, and seasonings - I knew I could replicate this at home.

There are quite a few flax seed cracker recipes out there, but it seems like most of them call for ground flax seed meal. And I'm sure that's fine, but I wanted to replicate the whole flax seed crackers I had. The flavor combinations are up to you, this batch was "cheese" and garlic flavored. Why the quotation marks? You'll see.

"Cheese" and Garlic Flax Seed Crackers

1 cup flax seeds

1 cup water

1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar

1/4 cup nutritional yeast, plus more if needed (the cheese!)

2 teaspoons garlic powder

1. Mix the flax seeds and water in a large bowl. Set aside for 1.5 - 2 hours. Should be gelatinous, pour off any excess water.

2. Mix in the remaining ingredients. The addition of nutritional yeast should be enough to thicken the mixture. Add more, if necessary.

3. Spread the mixture in a thin layer on a solid food dehydrator tray. Set on a low temp, ~ 150 degrees. Let it dry about four hours. If it's dry on top and still flexible, flip the cracker over and allow it to dry another 2-4 hours. Break into even sized pieces and store in an air tight container.

This can also be baked in the oven, I have not tested it yet, but I'm guessing same temperature and same length of time.

Early Morning Rambles and Cooking

Hello. Still there? Well I'm still here.

Been busy. Big things... mostly trying to buy a place and a car. Place I kinda have, car I need to work on. 

Still doing the keto thing, which has been alright. Stayed on this a lot longer than the Paleo dealie. Which is weird, because they are somewhat similar. You read about people going on keto and they talk about all this weight they lose right away. I'm a month in and I have lost an astounding... five pounds. 

Meh. 

Maybe I'm more keto-ish than keto. Or maybe I don't have water weight that needs to be lost. I must say, I drink a crapton more water now than I used to. I bring my 34 oz water bottle with me to work every day and half of it is gone before lunch. I fill it back up with ice and keep plugging along. 

I kind of miss things. Like ice cream. Why did I start this nonsense in the summer, the peak of all ice cream-ness? Instagram taunts me with pictues of ice cream sammies, black ice cream, this week's flavors at Snowman. And yes, I know I can go and get some, eff the sugar... but I end up talking myself out of it and eating blueberries and calling it a day. 

Since I passed out at 7 last night, I am up bright and early. May even go to the gym first thing this morning. In the meantime, I am reading yesterday's WSJ and cooking lunch. This week's lunches/dinners are Mexican shredded chicken either in a salad or over cauli rice. And don't get me wrong, it is tasty, but I need something else. Which explains why I got some fish and calamari after work yesterday. Totally hit the spot.

Now I'm cooking up some Filipino food. Laing, to be exact. And as paleo as many filipino dishes are, they are also keto friendly. Some adjustments here and there, but doable. Kelp and shiritaki noodles are decent replacements, and hello! no more bloat.

I've posted a recipe for laing in the past years. But it is simple - sauteed onion, garlic, and ginger. Diced pork belly and tuna. Collard greens, coconut milk, and fermented shrimp paste. Not sure how this will be over cauli rice, but it's pretty good on its own.

Keto Day 14 - So Much for a Daily Log (aka Read My Rambles)

Just when I think I'm over this bug, it likes to remind me I am way wrong. Yesterday was the non-stop throat clearing stage, to the point where I swear the back of my throat was bleeding. Today is the oh-so-pretty coughing up phlegm stage. Amazingly enough, not one cough while I worked out this morning, but the minute I stepped out the doors, coughcoughcoughcoughewwimgonnapuke.

Days 10 - 13 aren't posted because a) I was feeling too sick to; and b) I forgot. Even when the thought popped into my head I should write it up, I wasn't in the mood. Blogging is boring. Right now I have some time to kill. Writing up a shopping list for the week. This may bore the handful of people that still read this blog, but eh... life. I full expect those hits to drop.

I'm a little shocked that a place like Honest Weight does not sell treats that are both gluten free and sugar free. They have gluten free items, but they had sugar. There were sugar free items, but had grains of some sort. I may be wrong, and there is indeed something that fits that need, but no luck. I ended up eating some almonds and seaweed snax things. Savory is fine and all, but sweets damnit. I want a sweet. Got a fat bomb book that looks promising, I'll be posting some of my makes on here. When I remember, of course.

For those looking to forego bread, Red Robin offers a burger called the "Wedgie." It's on the menu next to the "Noogie," and the "Swirlie."

I joke. Mostly. Pretty badly.

Anyways, a burger with bacon and guacamole, wrapped in iceberg lettuce. It wasn't bad, except for the fact they cooked my burger wrong. I asked for medium rare, I got well. Maybe I should ask for blue next time, and if I'm lucky I'll get barely medium. Comes with a salad, under 500 calories, if that is something you care about.

Oh, I suppose my eating so far today

Breakfast - Coffee w/ half & half and mct oil. Two baked chicken thighs seasoned with cajun seasoning.

Snack - More chicken. If you can't tell, I'm trying to finish what I have on hand. Protein good. Blahblahblah bad. Lots of water. More coffee. Ho hum.

Lunch - Ended up eating on the late side, hit up the gym and I wasn't feeling hungry until the late afternoon. More chicken, surprise surprise.

Dinner - Blueberries. I was meal prepping (pork & chicken adobo, chicken stock, ground beef), and honestly nothing else sounded good. Although popcorn would have been nice while watching Twin Peaks.

Keto Day 9: Through Sickness to Good Health

To the people who say keto flu doesn't exist... you lie.

Well... let me take that back. You may be right. and I am not experiencing keto flu, but just have a really bad cold. Sore throat, stuffy nose, bouts of sleepiness. Very cranky. Two doses of dayquil and it had no effect. I'm ready to break out some chicken stock to slurp down, or if M is super cool, he'll pick up some Chinese food. Not really sure how much of it will be keto friendly, but whatever. I'm siiiiiiiiiick.

If you were wondering, keto flu is the umbrella name of a number of symptoms that people experience when they start on a ketogenic diet. Common symptoms include irritability, fatigue, upset stomach, nausea, and headaches. These symptoms stem from the body's switch from glucose to ketones as the main energy source.

Hmm... now that I think about it. Maybe it's a mixture of keto flu and allergies. I took an allergy med and I'm feeling slightly better. Or it's all in my head. Anyways, best way to battle KF, or whatever I'm experiencing is fluids and food.

Speaking of food, today's recap -

Breakfast - Woke up this morning alright, not necessary tired. After some yoga I was ready to eat. Large cup of coffee with half & half; half a cup of whole milk greek yogurt mixed w/ a handful of raspberries and blueberries, and a tablespoon of hemp hearts. May make this again but in an overnight n'oats kind of way. N'oats, as is no oats. I didn't come up with that. I read that somewhere.

Lunch - Lettuce wraps. I got the recipe from the One Pot Paleo cookbook. Ground beef, bamboo shoots, shiitake mushrooms, carrots and sweet peppers. Coconut aminos, fish sauce, chili pepper flakes. Pretty darn good. Did I write about this yesterday? Is this keto fog, or sick fog?

Dinner - The beef stir fry again, but this time with cauliflower rice. Not too bad, but real rice would be better. Damn carbs. Saved half of the cauli rice and the remainder of the beef for lunch tomorrow. I could probably use this same meat and turn it into hot & sour soup. Ah... possibilities.

Now if only I could breathe normally again.

Keto Day 8: Climbing Back on the Wagon

My sun room is flooded. I have been trying my best to pull everything away from the windows, but the wicker basket got hit. I don't really know what's in there... I think mostly biking stuff. But I get it... time to get rid of things I haven't used in years.

Recap of my day so far:

Breakfast - I wrote out my meals for the week. Something that would be doable, if it wasn't for the damn humidity. Large cold brew coffee with a splash of half & half. I brought raspberries with me, but I didn't get a chance to have some.

Lunch - Roasted beets and bacon salad with a lemon garlic vinaigrette. Pretty darn good. Sadly I used up the rest of that vinaigrette.

At this point I should have drank water. Lots of water. Forgot. Oops.

Snack - Finally got around to eating those raspberries. After work. After running to my car in the rain. Totally went over my carbs today. Oh wells.

Extra Snack - I was just going to buy a can of bamboo shoots. I ended up buying that, plus some jello, and shrimp w/ cocktail sauce, and chicken strips. Eff it, I at a pizza yesterday... what's two chicken strips?!? It was heavy on the black pepper and delicious.

Pre-Dinner - Shrimp cocktail is my fave. I should find a recipe for a sugar free version of cocktail sauce because I am sure there was sugar in it. Whatever. Didn't see it... didn't happen.

Water? Hah. I've been drinking mugs of hot tea. Throat has been killing me. We shall see how I feel in the morning.

Dinner - It's 10PM and I have yet to make it. But they will be lettuce wraps. Ground beef with shiitake mushrooms, bamboo shoots, shredded carrot. Cooked w/ coconut aminos, which is a bit too sweet for my tastes. Maybe it'll be my lunch tomorrow.

My Keto Experiment

On my way out the door one morning this week I mentioned to M, "this coconut oil in my coffee thing is weird." He slowly shook his head and went back to sleep.

So goes my life these days.

Warm weather makes me do silly things. Like give up ice cream. And bread. And sugar. But not beer... I'm not that crazy. This week is two weeks on keto. Actually, three, if you count my test week before I started last week. And it's been okay. And minus the beer, I've been sticking to it.

Except for tonight. I made some pizza for M and the temporary neighbors. I was going to abstain, but I was curious to see if my baking skills had fallen by the wayside. They haven't, if you were wondering. I thought my body would react more to the bread, but I guess it hasn't been that too long since I gave it up.

Originally I started on the 30 day plan from Healthful Pursuit, but a week into it and I got bored. So now I'm just picking and choosing through my many cookbooks. Tweaking recipes so it works into my macros of 70% fat, 20% protein, and 10% carbohydrates. Lots of salads, lots of bacon. Not that I'm complaining about that. The egg heavy dishes, I guess I'll get used to.

Keto, or ketogenic is a diet focused on low carbs and high fat. Eating in this method eventually leads the body into ketosis, which uses fat for energy. That's a very simplified description of it, so I suggest you google your way to a better understanding.

I'll try to do a better job about tracking my progress this week.